It's almost midnight and I most definitely should be tired by now. Usually I am awake until about 10 o'clock before nodding off but this weeks a bit more stressful for me. Somebody who doesn't have a day to day problem with anxiety may not understand this topic so I apologize if this comes across as over-reactive to some of you haha!
August has been a pretty miserable month for me, knowing that at the end of the month John, my wonderful boyfriend, is going away for a week and I won't be able to see him. Some people would probably think 'So what? It's only a week' and then other people who suffer from anxiety may think they're world has ended like myself..
I am writing this post to share my tips on dealing with anxiety when you cant have access to somebody who makes you feel at ease and calm. Right now I actually don't have anxiety, I haven't this week thus far thanks to these tips that I will share but I have only just learnt them from my counselling sessions building up to this moment. When learning that John was going on holiday, I automatically thought seriously negative thoughts. Like 'What if the plane crashes?' or 'What if he forgets me?' or 'What if he gets hurt over there?' - all extreme thoughts which I convinced myself was going to happen, therefore all month I was having panic attacks, planning that my week without him would be so miserable and lonely which made my entire month miserable and no doubt made him feel bad for even going which should not be the case* at all. (Pardon the pun)*
I knew that I shouldn't be worrying about him, I am not his mum at the end of the day! I knew that but I still couldn't help think really negative thoughts which made me feel so anxious over the entire thing. If anybody else has or is experiencing this then I hope these tips that I have been doing really help you. I don't know anybody with anxiety so if I was to confide in my friends they might not fully understand why I am worrying so much. I hope to find more people who suffer with anxiety by making these posts and also sharing my tips on dealing with it in the small chance of it helping someone else.
From going to see a counselor, I quickly realized that I was explaining the entire situation from a negative point of view. Like I was planning already to have a miserable week. I was planning for Johns plane to crash and I was planning for him to forget all about me when he was away. I learned that I can put as much energy into thinking positive about things than I do negative. Which is hard when you have a bad habit of doing so! So when ever i thought I'm going to be lonely, I thought of ways to not be lonely...like working six days a week haha! Keeping busy is a great way to help anxiety because you're not sat with your thoughts rushing around your head making something into a bigger thing than it originally would be.
When ever I thought about Johns plane crashing...which stemmed from the recent plane incidents plastered all over the news...I thought about why a plane crash is on the news. Because they are so rare! It's much more dangerous to travel in a car then by plane so thinking this made me see the realistic side to my thoughts and made me understand how extreme it actually was.
When thinking about John 'forgetting me' while he's away I now try and think that I am overeacting and I have a bond with him which will be hard to forget. I understand this may seem really over the top to some readers but its just the way I am! You've gotta play the hand you were dealt!
I also started to think about how having a nice week to myself would be nice and to relax in my own bed :) Also by going to work I would be earning money to go towards another holiday with him ha!
I hope this has helped somebody in some way! I've written this post for my viewers as well as myself. It's like getting something off your chest!
The blog Sunday Girl is written by Anita Wheeler who blogs about eveything from fashion to baking, beauty to more pressing issues like Anxiety.